Spontaneous Grace

birthdayIf you follow along over on the grams, you are already sick and tired of the fact that we celebrated my birthday this weekend. Donuts! Adventures to get tacos! Party hats and potlucks with not one, but two trays of mac n’ cheese! Party rockin’ in the house tonight, every night.

28. Maybe it’s the new school year, or maybe it’s that it falls right as I start a new year, but I’m thinking a lot this week about what I want to define 28. I have concrete things that I want to accomplish, things like finishing Parks and Recreation and cranking out my dissertation prospectus and a chapter or two. I want to manage to keep just one plantalive and stay on top of grading alllll semester long. But I also have some abstract things that I want to define 28 a whole lot more than they defined 27.

This might come as a surprise, but I am the world’s least spontaneous person. People are shocked by this, because I am loud, I am crazy, and I like FUN. But I do not like spontaneous things. They stress me out. James can call and suggest that we grab burgers instead of dinner, and I will practically have a meltdown, as I have not only planned our meals a week in advance, but I have also calculated the order in which fresh produce will go bad and we cannot deviate. An impromptu ice cream run? Not if I have already indulged in a treat for the day. An unscheduled trip? Nope, because I have my work for the semester carefully mapped out. I am the world’s most predictable fun creator and that’s the way I like it.

But it’s also a problem, because life sometimes demands spontaneity, and even when it doesn’t, it sure makes life more fun. I want to be the type of person who not only plans ahead, but also drops plans when they need to be dropped. I want to be more spontaneous as long as it is easy, so that I can weave it better into life when it’s hard.

Most of all, I want to be more spontaneous in how I extend grace. As a recipient of unfathomable grace, I want it to flow out of me in a steady rush. Sometimes 27 saw it barely trickling, as I am not near so quick to extend grace as I am to need it from others. I want forgiveness to come faster than condemnation, grace to rise quicker than judgement.

Here’s to 28 being defined by spontaneous grace.

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10 Responses to Spontaneous Grace

  1. Ashley Smith says:

    Happy birthday!! I was looking at your various DC posts over the weekend and saw (in what now seems to be a very stalkerish way) that it was your birthday. I hope this is your best year yet! I would not have instinctively thought of you as getting stressed out by spontaneity, but now that I think about it, the things you guys do seem so well planned and executed that you’d HAVE to be a stellar planner. That is a major strength. 🙂

  2. mrsroe says:

    Spontaneous grace would make a great blog name, in case you are still looking.

  3. Jenn hawk says:

    One really good way to help with all of this is to intentionally build in margins. One of the best sermons I’ve heard was on how we should build in margins into all areas of our lives. How can we be generous with our time if every second is scheduled away? How can we be generous with our money if every cent is budgeted away? Buy building in extra margins, that gives us the freedom to open up with people. See a person in need? You know you have the space in your budget to help them out? Have a friend going through a hard time? You can spend an evening with them bc you arent totally booked.

    This is really hard for me, bc i tend to be like you. I schedule out my weekends and evenings to within an inch of their life. But remembering to make space to love ppl is always improtant.

  4. Happy Birthday! I love my birthday too! I love the idea of spontaneous grace. Especially the thought of it “flow[ing] out of me in a steady rush.” Thanks for a great post. aileengoeson.com

  5. E.H says:

    YOU are not spontaneous?! That is amazing. Would have never guessed it. Loved this post. Happy 28 to you, girl! ❤

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